Parents Don't Let Your Children Grow Up to be Spurs Fans

I came to a realization today. I hate the Spurs. Now I used to hate them. Or at least I thought I did. But now I truly realize I hate them. Not because they win. I actually like dynasties, so it's not that. They represent what is wrong with basketball. Now most people will tell you that they are the epitome of how to play the game (at least at the NBA level). But I disagree. What do coaches tell young kids to do? Hustle, play as a team, pass the ball, and have fun. But that's all bologna by high school, and everyone knows it. Maybe even earlier than that. The way basketball should be played is certainly to hustle, work hard, and have fun. But it's also giving your best player the ball and letting him do something to put it in the hoop. If he can't do it, give it to the next best option, whether they are the next best player or an open player who can make an open shot. So that's how to play right. It can vary at different levels, but there are basic principles that must be observed. Generally all that team work stuff is to compensate for being a bad team or not having any stand out players. As I've said before, the reason Kobe shoots so much is that if he takes thirty shots a game, I would be willing to bet that twenty to twenty five of them were the best chance for the Lakers to score on that possession. So that means he should be shooting it more than the crab fishermen teammates he has. So now that I've explained how basketball should be played, how shouldn't it be played? This doesn't change at any level, and these sort of things would never happen on Norman Dale's court. Whining, complaining, layups with the wrong hand, recklessly dribbling through traffic with your head down and throwing the ball towards the hoop (again with the wrong hand) and dirty cheap shot plays. Does this sound familiar to you? That's how the Spurs play basketball. Tim Duncan whines almost as much as Rasheed Wallace, except he doesn't have a head band to throw. And have you ever seen him after he gets called for a foul? He hits the guy on the head, arm, and body, walks around like nothing happened, then hears shooting foul on number twenty one, and his eye balls pop out of his head, his arms go up, and he looks like someone who just got told there is hard proof that he shot the president, even though the person was watching TV all day. It's despicable. He thinks he can do no wrong. Remember when Joey Crawford kicked him out of the game when he was on the bench? You don't think Duncan was talking shit, complaining about Crawford, or something else completely degrading towards him? Then he made his Duncan face, threw his arms up, then walked off like a victim. Plus he has armpit afros. Gross. Duncan isn't the only whiner though. The whole team does it, they just aren't as good at the faces. Parker and Ginobli are bad at it. Man-ew is one of the worst floppers in the league. I hate when players hit the floor because the wind is blowing. It makes guys who really do give up their bodies look like shams too. Another problem with those two is how they drive to the basket with their heads down, throw up dumb shots with their wrong hand, and either get lucky or a bail out call because that's how the NBA works. You shouldn't drive to the left side of the basket and then shoot a layup with your right hand. You're a pro, and you can't use your other hand? Go back to France. And that final reason I hate the Spurs: Bush league players playing dirty. Bruce Bowen is the second dirtiest player in the league (he would be the run away favorite in this category, but he never grabbed a nut from another guys tool bag during the game... actually Bowen is dirtier, he's probably just too afraid to reach into the tool bag because he might go for the screwdriver). How many guys have to roll ankles on Bowen's foot before this guy gets stopped? How many times can he grab a jersey, arm, pinch your leg, elbow your kidney, step on your foot, or tap your elbow when you shoot? The point of all of this is, don't let your kids watch the Spurs. They play basketball the wrong way. Let your kids watch guys like Kevin Garnett, Kobe Bryant, and why not, Steve Nash. Those three players might have the most passion for the game in the NBA today. I don't think you'll find anyone more driven to win, whatever that takes. Kobe does it by scoring and playing phenomenal defense. Garnett does it with his all around game and desire to do what the team needs him to do, not what he thinks he should be doing. And Nash does it by making those around him infinitely better by his passing and leadership along with clutch shots. Those guys all want to win. And I bet you won't see any of them stepping under guys when they shoot, whining after hacking a guy on the arm (although Kobe does his share of complaining, but mostly on offense and its not so whiny because he looks kind of scary when he does it), or recklessly going to the hoop without knowing their other options and making the best choice (and again, for you Kobe haters, the guy is a great drive and dish player, but he's also a great finisher, which is why he takes the shot a lot). Parents, don't let your kids grow up to be Spurs fans.